Friday, May 28, 2010

Frida y is almost over but it is still Friday and here are the things that must go.

1. Shape ups
Lar, this is for you. I don't even know that this needs commentary. Really? Are you kidding me? You're not? Well, good luck with that.

2. cauliflower

cauliflower is the equivalent of water in the vegetable world--it tastes like nothing. i hate it. don't even try to sneak it into my dish. especially as a puree. this means you, jessica seinfeld. you and your nasty puree parlor tricks.also, does this picture give anyone else weird feelings? first picture that came up when i googled cauliflower. awesome. it looks like scabs. see? cauliflower=scabs. get it outta here.

3. kate gosselin

kinda can't believe she's still around. kinda can't believe she made it as far as she did with that "no/yes" hair. Extensions won't save you, Kate. is anyone else as sick of her as i am? i think you are. but if that's the case, WHY IS SHE STILL EVERYWHERE?!
4. T-R-U-Kstrucks. BIG ones. big ol' Utah trucks. there's probably one right on your bumper right now on I-15. like this one. I got news for you, meathead. just because you're in a truck listening to Alan Jackson doesn't make you invincible. pretty sure 90mph will kill you just as much as it will kill me in my ford probe. just sayin.

also, I'm sorry you have to overcompensate for things. yikes.

5. Dave Matthews Band

if you had to listen to this all day every day at work like i do, you'd hate it, too. a girl can only handle so much jam band sensibilities. plus, every song sounds the same. don't even try to tell me that's not true. i will punch you in the face. lovingly, of course.

I would also like to lovingly add the series finale of LOST. Maybe they could try again in six months, I find it unacceptable.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

so sorry to have neglected you

Here I am! Did you miss me? I have been very busy watching disappointing t.v series finales and terrible movies. I thought of something fun, do you want to join in? Please? It wont be fun if you don't play, oh you will? Great. Its a add on list. Starts with a couple from me then one (or more) from you then the next person and so on. Just leave your add on in the comments section. Thank you ahead of time for being so wonderful . So without further delay our first add on list:

Songs that without fail always get you dancing, no matter how terrible they are.

1. Holiday by Madonna
2. Gimme More Britney Spears
3. Get down on it Kool and the gang

Alright, ball is in your court. Remember we are not here to judge (I also really like Party in the USA by Miley Cyrus, its not my fault it is so catchy!) Please do tell what really gets your toe tappin. Annnnnnd tomorrow is Friday! Get ready for things that must go!

Monday, May 24, 2010

Since it is SNOWING IN MAY!

I suggest staying in all day with a book and doing nothing but snuggling and reading, throw a warm drink in there and you are good.
Why Books are Awesome--a List.
1) There are an unlimited amount of options
2) When you've picked the right book, you feel transported to another world
3) Books allow you to leave your problems/drama/chaos behind for a little while
4) Books allow you insight into all sorts of different minds
5) When you've finished a new great book you feel accomplished and happy
AND eager to read another one
6) and the biggest reason books are awesome--it is the best way to spend a quiet afternoon,
curled up on the couch with a hot chocolate or cup of tea and reading a good book.

I will never stop reading. Seriously, it brings me such joy!

This list is from my sister Abby who is a avid reader. Lets make a list of great summer reads shall we? Please email me your pick so I can compile a list!

Sunday, May 23, 2010

For Sunday from me

The things that I love about Sunday

1. afternoon naps. I think everyone agrees that Sunday afternoons are made for napping.
2. delicious meals, Sunday is also for eating do not forget.
3. for the most part my house is really quiet and mellow.
4. no one expects you to do anything, anything you do is just a bonus.
5. it is the last day of the weekend, one last chance for relaxation.

Hope everyone had a great weekend, you can look forward to a more respectable list tomorrow.

Friday, May 21, 2010

And presenting- Things that must go Friday by the lovely Amy Morby

ahem. things that must go.

1. pants without pockets.

what are you trying to pull here? definitely NOT awesome.

2. corporate toilet paper

i don't know why corporate America can't spring for some softer toilet paper. i don't know why there hasn't been a full-on class action lawsuit on this one. one thing i DO know is that my undercarriage is pissed. undercarriages across America are pissed. 'nuff said.

3. men in the office that spray too much air freshener after they poop
let's face it--you're not fooling anyone. obviously when the entire office "mysteriously" smells like glade cinnamon sticks, you pooped. go easy on the spray. a little spritz will do ya. i promise.

4. voicemail menus
omg. O.M.G. do i seriously have to sit through 3 minutes of robot lady voice before I can leave my freakin message? is it really necessary to go through all those options when all I ask is a simple beep? I'm writing the voicemail bureaucrats about this right this minute. hell hath no fury.

5. sticky babies
sticky babies really grind my gears. stop judging--i'm not a babyphobe. i know babies inevitably get sticky. but they don't have to stay that way--especially punch mouth. i believe there's a product for that--it's pretty revolutionary. In fact, they might even be a few bucks at Wal-Mart. They're called wet wipes. Ever heard of them? Probably not. You should check them out. They're pretty awesome.
i didn't want to put in a picture of a sticky baby because that might be mean. but i bet this couple has sticky babies.
Always a pleasure Amy. Please one and all do not shy away from sending me your lists, I have loved every single one I have received.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Because everyone knows Wednesdays are even worse than Mondays


1. Do not eat Monster Munch
2. Do not cry, moan or argue with anyone about the election (again)
3. Procrastinate by any of the following – checking facebook, ebay, or
any of the BBC live blogs or the Guardians either, well at least after
I know who’s in the Cabinet.
4. Do something - anything on one of my lists
5. Do not lose the lists or accidently throw them out in a cleaning
frenzy (Unlikely to work self into frenzy of any description today)
6. Do not colour coordinate the lists so I become 10% more effective.
(Strictly speaking this comes under the banner of procrastination but
does mean I get to use highlighter pens to my heart’s content)
7. Do not Re-write the lists in my best handwriting. (See 6).
8. Do not Type the lists up on a spreadsheet then re-order them all,
(yup still procrastinating).
9. Do some work
10. Get emails down under 3 figures even by randomly deleting them.
11. Do not eat a toffee crisp or other assorted chocolate
12. Tidy up foot high random pile of paper on desk.
13. Remember to pick up the kid
14. Don’t let the kid watch Eastenders
15. Watch Eastenders
16. Ransack kitchen for a rogue pack of Monster Munch.

For reference purposes:

Thanks for the list Sheonagh, please do keep them coming. All the way from Scotland, this blog is going global baby!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

For the intense movie snobs

Curtis my husband is really intense about lists. As you can see he has been makin lists since 2005 at least. I think it would be really great if this list sparks a debate of some kind. Also please be prepared because starting this week on Friday I will have a special guest lister listing about all the things that must go. You do not want to miss it.
Monday, October 24, 2005

Top 5 trilogies of all time!

5. Die Hard. I really think this is one of the best action series around. Some may say Lethal Weapon is better but to them I say...Joe Pesci. The 4th leathal weapon was no Passion of the Christ either.

4. Back To The Future. While time travel movies usually just frustrate me (Time Cop, Black Night, Clockstoppers, etc.) these really made me happy. It also involves cheating on sports betting which is also quite a fantasy of mine. I never grow tired of watching Biff's face end up in horse feces.

3. The Matrix. I don't care what any of you nay-sayers have to say about the rocked! The second was a little boring (please refer to ten minute sword fight atop a speeding diesel) but the first movie MORE than made up for any crap you could come up with. Also, it would have been even better if the original oracle would have been alive. The first Matrix movie made my mind soar like an eagle. The first night I saw it I woke up with an eagle feather under my pillow...true story.

2. Star Wars. I'm talkin' original trilogy here. Puppets, muppets, midgets and robots made this one work big time for me! It pre-dates Lucas trying to direct by himself and therefor was 10x better than the recent releases. What little kid didn't want to be a tan-tan?

1. Lord of the Rings. This trilogy kicked so much butt that it kicked Oprah's butt!!! I'll be the first to admit that I cried when Frodo and Sam split up. I cried when Frodo left the shire. Shiz, I cried when Gandalf accidently dropped his hat. I don't know what to say (and I'm a little out of breath right now just thinking about the films) but that this was the best series of movies ever made!!!

Also runners up: Rambo, Indiana Jones, Terminator, Godfather and maybe on a sad level...Blade.

Monday, May 17, 2010

On Mondays you just need something short and sweet

My top 5 favorite Dogs
1. Chili Cheese Dog
2. Corn Dog
3. Airbud
4. Hot Dog
5. Bruiser (my dog)

I would like to add our dog Duke (above pictured) to the worlds cutest dogs list. Thank you to Walker for sending me the list all the way from China. Now lets get a list of all the freaky foods you have eaten there. Stay tuned this week for some good lists including a best movie list by the snobbiest movie snob ever. My husband.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

YOU are good enough, probably too good to send me a list!

I have had several people tell me they they love the blog but don't have a list for me. I know that you do. If we are going to make this blog world famous and me a millionaire I need your help! The internet is going to get real tired of my lists day after day! So I up and stole this list from my friend Sarahs' blog cause she is an awesome mom and even awesome moms have days like this list.
Things I Did Not Do Today

1. I did not have clean socks for my son to wear to school today (I will leave the results up to your imagination)
2. I did not get in the shower before noon.
3. I did not watch while my children ate breakfast in front of the tv.
4. I did not get the laundry folded, again.
5. I did not get any of the girl’s hair brushed and done up cute.
6. I did not get the lawn mowed (which I blame wholly on the rain)
7. I did not manage to go for 24 hours without facebook, again…
8. I did not get the car vacuumed, and the kids are starting to wonder what that smell is…
9. I did not take the kids to Disneyland today(and am reminded constantly of this by said kids)
10.I did not make it through the day without a good amount of my caffeinated beverage of choice, but then, I wasn’t really trying either.
11.I did not get the blinds dusted, and the little one has started drawing pictures on them.
12.I did not have the guts to post this list on the blog that I intended it for, which shows that at almost thirty we can still be a little too concerned about what people think of us!
p.s. Sarah has four darling well behaved Children, just a FYI.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Because I am having my own water woes on this rainy day in Salt Lake city

My Recent Water Woes:

1) Our water got turned off because we are new at being homeowners and didn't change it into our names in time. We had to ration the water in the pitcher in our fridge. I don't like rationing water, I like flushing, washing my hands, face etc. watering my plants, drinking. You can laugh its okay...we did.
2) After our water gets turned on, a frozen pipe floods our basement. Good times.
3) It has rained every day this week.
4) Worst of all, yesterday at Walmart I was trying to be a good Samaritan and return my cart to its designated area and an evil puddle drenched my whole shoe, sock and pant leg.

Come back sunshine.

Thank you Jessica! Everyone loves a list when you make fun of your own crappy situation, don't we? Keep those lists coming. And also you can look forward to this blog getting a facelift soon thanks to the ever awesome Amy Morby

Thursday, May 13, 2010

This list makes me think-

Have I mastered anything?

Guy Lebeda

1. Grilling chicken (the secret: "brine" the chicken first)
2. Making tomato soup (tip: heavy cream & fresh basil, &, oh yes, tomatoes fresh from the garden)
3. Writing with a fountain tip (pretend you are drawing)
4. Writing letters (the ink-on-paper kind)
5. Pointless conversations (please provide spacious front porch)
6. Making to-do lists (not to be confused with DOING to-do lists)
7. Long distance driving, alone
8. Non-porn web surfing (they filter the web at work)
9. Keeping the scorecard at baseball games
10 Procrastination (I usually start by making a list of some sort)

You know I love the the list reference in this list. Also what a well rounded dude you are Guy. Keep those lists a comin!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Bailey the Blogger

This is Bailey my youngest lister yet. I would also be interested in her list on "Best(or worst) things about a middle school dance" Who else wants to see that list?

Why I love blogging/ blogs…

1. Able to keep up with family and friend’s busy lives

2. Feeling special when someone comments on your posts

3. Getting to hear all the funny things Deacon says

4. Having a reason to take pictures

5. Posting funny videos

6. Reading cute blogs like “rock star diaries and nienie dialogues”

7. And last but not least… Making lists to post on your blog!

Everyone go take a look at Baileys blog and take note of #2 on this list. Thanks Bailey, excellent list! Looking forward to more lists from you!

Lost Glasses

A list by a stressed out mom my sister Amelia
Things you do when your child loses their glasses.
1. You quiz child repeatedly about WHERE she took them off.
2. Child cannot remember.
3. You ransack likely places, between sofa cushions, under bed covers, in Lego box.
4. You may swear a little.
5. You look downstairs, upstairs, kitchen, bags, car. No glasses.
6. You try and keep your shizz together, and ask child to come and see you.
7. You suggest through gritted teeth that a little prayer be uttered that we can find the glasses.
8. You keep looking.
9. Child mutters under breath, "I guess prayers don't work, we didn't find my glasses"
10. You feel like failure and now child does not believe in prayer.
11. You swear a little more.
12. You report to husband that not only does Monday morning suck, now your
child does not believe in prayer. It is a stellar morning.
13. You continue looking, now returning to places you have already
looked in desperation. You even examine the dirty clothes basket.
14. Your husband tells child to stand up, (child has been laying on floor, daydreaming).
15. Husband locates childs glasses in child's pocket of coat CHILD IS CURRENTLY WEARING.
16. Utter this helpful phrase to close the teaching moment, "See?! Prayer DOES work DAMMIT!"
17. Amen.

This list is awesome. And Amelia is awesome for submitting it, don't you just feel awesome? If all my prayers were answered I would be Heidi Klum right now,oh and a millionaire.

Things I woke up to this morning. A list

1. Deacon saying "I need daddy to cut my fingermails in the baffroom"
2. Three! new lists in my inbox. One from the youngest blogger I know and one from someone in China! (pretend you do not know my little brother is in China.)
3. The aftermath of a nighttime rainfall, so good smells and clean earth.

I still want so many lists! I am a list maniac. So please send me all your lists. Soon I will be requesting specific lists, wont that be fun? Then you don't even have to be creative. Together we can list anything we wan't!

Monday, May 10, 2010

Laura and a little list

That girl drinking the ketchup is Laura. She hates milk and that is why she is drinking ketchup.

Why i hate milk. A list by Laura Kramer

1. i always feel like i need a drink of water after i drink milk

2. it's too thick

3. it's milk.

4. i feel like i can taste it spoiling as i drink it

5. it has terrible flavor

Totally agree Laura, what a list. Next I need a list from YOU. Yes YOU. Email me Congratulations Laura for being the first guest lister on the soon to be world famous blog!

Very first list

Why to start this blog, a list.

1. I really like making and checking off lists.
2. Who doesn't like lists?
3. Because I want to see your lists
4. Also I am endlessly making lists and I want to keep the good ones somewhere, like here.
5. Because I like to blog and I like to make lists so please indulge me and a: tell me what you want a list of b: submit a list to me so I can publish it here. or c: just read my lists and tell me what you think. So lets get started. who will be my first guest lister? Cmon' I know you want to!